Raising Hell: A Smoked out Reflection on the Hellraiser Franchise pt. 2
Art by Sun Khamunaki
Thankfully Mercury Retrograde ends tomorrow and we enter the shadow phase. Things can start flowing again and moving forward. I did some manual labor this week unloading a truck of pumpkins. Felt good being out in nature, getting it out the mud, and staying connected with my divine masculine.
I realized I never talked about my feelings about the last Hellraiser book — The Scarlet Gospels. The hype surrounding this book was insane and I was waiting for years. Barker spoke about it in multiple interviews and said it was over 1k pages. I was willing to pick up a 1k page book no matter the price. Somehow this got edited down to 368 pages over the course of three years I believe. I was super disappointed after reading it, and wondered why this sequel felt so tame and watered down. There are flashes of brilliance, but I feel like the editing must have cut the heart out from the seams of the book. I blame it on the publishing house even though I understand marketing a 1k book would be somewhat difficult.
We’re back to reviewing the rest of the Hellraiser franchise below. I’m enduring this hell so you don’t have to….
Hellraiser VI: Hellseeker (2002) — “Welcome to the worst nightmare-reality.” This was a cool entry. The tone in the beginning was somewhat silly, but I respect the more subtle hallucinatory approach in this one compared to the in-your-face entries. Horrific dreams, hellish headaches, and ambiguity across the board. I’m thankful I wasn’t assaulted by chains, blood, and viscera. Worth a watch when you have nothing better to do 5.8/10
Hellraiser VII: Deader (2005) — This one starts out with an edgy journalist holding a crack pipe, and she proudly shows off an article in a newspaper that’s titled “How to Be a Crack Whore.” Ole girl is sent to Romania in search of the Deaders-these zombie-like people. And of course, it feels a bit like Resident Evil early on. The story logic feels forced into the Hellraiser universe and manages to be boring as hell. I had to force myself to finish this. Doug Bradley is the only redeeming quality of this movie, but that’s not enough to save this mess 4/10
Hellraiser VIII: Hellworld (2005) — “Evil Goes Online.” It only took 7 Hellraiser movies before they added a somewhat prominent black character let alone POC to the franchise. However, black people wouldn’t mess around with the Lament Configuration, so it’s understandable. This one tries to be funny but the humor falls flat. It’s melodramatic, campy, and manages to be boring. And the roundhouse kick is ridiculous. I hate it 3/10
Hellraiser: Revelations (2011) — This is trash. There’s some interesting found footage in the beginning, but it’s whatever. Doug Bradley didn’t even want to play Pinhead, so they replaced him with a goofy I couldn’t take seriously. The acting is terrible and I’m so tired of these chains ripping through flesh. There has to be something else interesting in the realm of pain and pleasure 2.3/10
Hellraiser: Judgement (2018) — This one had a promising start and you can tell there was more care behind this one. Still, this feels like a rehash of Inferno. Apparently, the director Gary J. Tunnicliffe was pitching this story since 1996 and finally got the greenlight. Sadly, it becomes derivative of Se7en and finds a way to become boring and preachy. I’m so tired of this franchise 4.9/10
General takeaways: Hellraiser is a great concept and mythos, but somewhat difficult to execute when there are too many cooks in the kitchen aka Hollywood. I feel second-hand stress and frustration for Clive Barker. A lot of these movies are so demoralizing to watch. Damn, this franchise sucks and lacks originality. Fingers crossed that the Hulu version is better.
So Ryan Jackson invited me back onto Mutual Aberration Society to talk about the underground gem Gonin (1995) directed by Takashi Ishii. Fantastic flick I highly recommend if you can find it. Can’t wait to check out more of his catalogue. You can listen to us spoil the entire movie here.
On the writing front, slowly working my way through revisions of Project Hum and working on Project Bullet Baby. I want to make Project Bullet Baby a proper book if that makes sense in terms of length and substance.
Currently Watching: Moon Knight & Ozark Season 1 & House of the Dragon Season 1 & Atlanta Season 4
Currently Reading: Ill Behavior by M. Steven S. & God Damn Chainsaw Murderer by Sean M. Thompson & Nudes by Elle Nash & Chainsaw Man by Tatsuki Fujimoto & Women Who Run With the Wolves by Clarissa Pinkola Estes
Currently Smoking: 3C Farms
Currently Listening to: Black Tapes Podcast & The Danny Brown Podcast
Talk about positive affirmations…just a feel good song from Hendrixxx that gets you amped.
I watched this video high and it felt like a transcendental experience. Something about the beat felt so majestic and Kodak’s flow felt impeccable. Wow…
“I may not be a good man, but I got good intentions…”
Ka bares his soul on the lyrical single “Ascension” and I’m here for it.
MUBU religion…King Louie is back and seems to be in good spirits on “KISSES.” The Grandfather of drill drops some clever bars over the bombastic beat.
Until next time…
I honestly had no idea there were this many movies. That's insane.